Monday, July 16, 2012
The invisible wall (Chapter 10)
Leeteuk just finished his daily routine at the gym. Lately he's been diligently working out on his muscles especially his arms and his abs preparing for his new album and the enlistment. He knows he won't have much time before the enlistment, and with proper preparation, he will be undergoing the enlistment period without any problem. 2 years will just pass in a blink. Kangin said to him before.
He grabs his phone from the pocket, waiting for Sora to call. Seems like Sora's schedule finished a bit later than planned. They haven't been able to meet each other much after the strike happened to MBC which impacted the filming of WGM episodes.
He put down the phone and started to surf through the internet looking for interesting news of SuJu and Sora like he always do. At times when his schedule is bit leisure like today, he misses Sora's company.
A call from Sora came in.
"Did you just finish your schedule?" Excitedly he picks up the phone. He's been waiting for her.
"Emm.. I have lots of scene today." Sora sighed, she sounded tired. She's currently filming for Dream High 2.
"Are you home already? Have you taken your bath?" Leeteuk concerns.
"anie.. I just got home. Wanted to rest for a while before showering. So I called you" her head feels really heavy, the feeling for just going to sleep is so strong right now.
"You must be really tired" he sounded pity. He wishes he could be with her. Cuddling her until she falls asleep.
"A bit.. But I have to endure. Did you waiting for long?"
"Kwenchana... you must be troubled to call me despite of your busy schedule right?"
"Anieya, this is the least that we can do to keep in touch..."
"I miss you..." He said to Sora waiting for her reply but she just remain silent listened to it. "Did you hear me?" He asked.
"Dae.." Sora answered tiredly. She knows what Leeteuk just said just now but she choose to not answer it. Her heart is complicated enough with all Leeteuk's event before this. She felt that this moment of break from meeting each other is the moment given for her to rethink and consider her feelings towards Leeteuk before she gets too involve in her own feelings.
Silent from both sides.
"Oppa?" Sora trying to check whether the line got disconnected. He's not paying much attention to his conversation with Sora anymore as his eyes are glued to his computer screen. Stumbled upon something while he's surfing.
"Dae..." Leeteuk answering halfheartedly, something on his computer screen grabbing his attention more.
"What’s wrong? Why you suddenly become silent?"
"Do you have anything that you should have told me?"Leeteuk's voice changed.
Sora didn't get where Leeteuk is getting into. "What do you mean?"
"It’s okay, just forget it." Leeteuk tried to hold him from going further.
Sora still not getting the situation. Something must be bothering Leeteuk and it makes her even more curious. "Tell me, what is it?"
"Anieya.. Just forget it." He hesitant.
"You're acting strange..." Sora not satisfied with the situation. Her curious feeling is killing her. "If you're not telling me, i'll hang up now" She snaps.
Leeteuk's eyes very much still on the screen. The pictures in front of his eyes are ripping off his heart. Sora should have told him before he knows it on his own.
"You're kissing scene..." He did not proceed further. His voice is full with jealousy.
Sora got silent listening to that. She shouldn't insist on knowing if she knew what's coming. She sighed silently. Sometimes she feels that Leeteuk's jealousy is too much for someone his age and they are not even in a real relationship.
"Oppa.. that's just an acting" She's trying to clarify the situation even though she knows it won't change so much of Leeteuk's jealousy.
"You.. should have told me earlier... before i found it by myself."
"Oppa, i'm too tired to discuss about this" Sora trying to get away from the discussion. Her day has been too long today and the jealousy that Leeteuk's showing did not ease her feeling tonight.
"Are you trying to avoid this discussion?"
"It's not that. But i'm really tired." Sora sounded weak. She knows she should have just apologize and do her aegyo to ease the situation, but she just don't feel like apologizing. Not under their current confused situation. Who is she in Leeteuk's heart?
"You shouldn't have called me if you know that you're tired" Leeteuk being blunt.
"What are you saying oppa? Why you're being like this suddenly?"
"Just let this be. You should take your rest since you're tired." Leeteuk trying to get over the conversation quickly. He knows if he continues longer the situation will get worst.
"Don't say anything... I need time on my own. I'll hang up now" Without waiting for any words from Sora.
Sora looked at her phone attentively. She don't understands that guy's behavior. He can be warm at times but very cold too. He still didn't get over his over-jealousy attitude. Sometimes he behaves like a person who has lots of insecurity.
“Shouldn't it suppose to be me to feel that way?” She thought to herself. Its been 6 months since they know each other but they never talk about their heart and feelings, but Leeteuk has always shows his jealousy towards her acting partner unnecessarily.
Leeteuk keep staring at the computer screen blankly. He knows he shouldn't have acted that way. Sora must be in curiosity of what just happened. But the jealousy that he felt and the uncertainty that he's been feeling with Sora is killing him. Unpredictable. That’s the best word that he can explain how he feels about Sora. Sometimes he felt that there's actually an invisible wall between both of them. The one that is very hard to break off. Maybe she don't have any feelings for him after all, he thoughts to himself.